Aunt Shannon's getting hitched today

We've got a wedding on this great fall day, as our wonderful Aunt Shannon is getting hitched. In honor of her, here's an oldie, but goodie.

A preemptive congrats to the happy couple.

Making sense

"Perhaps God tires of calling

the aged to His fold,

So He picks a rosebud

before it can grow old ..."

I don't understand a lot of things in this world. The origins of the universe. All 9,833 sections of the Internal Revenue Code. How to calculate a quarterback's Passer Rating.

Most of the things I don't understand, someone can sit me down and teach me. Or at least have some semblance of an explanation. Whether I can understand said explanation is a different story, but the explanation is more than likely reasonable, something the semi-educated person can grasp.

I don't understand the death of a child.

People can stop many things in this world. People can explain many problems. People can heal many illnesses. When a child passes, people cannot do any of those things. Cannot stop grieving. Cannot explain sorrow. Cannot heal broken hearts. Only time can do those things. And in this saddest of circumstances, time is against us.

We want time to pass more quickly: to begin our healing, end our grieving, explain our sorrow. Sadly, it doesn't. Everything moves in slow motion; every second feels like an hour, every hour a day, and so on.

All we can do is sit and wait for time to catch up to us, a race that can't be won.

When an adult dies, there's the expectation that person lived their life -- played their first tee ball game, had their first kiss, went on their first date, owned their first car, had their first job. That person had experiences that can be reflected upon. When a child dies, there are only what-ifs.

We can think about the joy children bring us, the beauty that pours out of them. We can think of all of the happiness they filled the world with in their short time here. We can tell stories and show pictures and laugh and cry and laugh some more.

But then there's the silence. Then, the tears. Lather, rinse, repeat.

You might be able to give me reasons for why a child dies, but you can't ever explain it. It's one of those things in this world I will never fully understand.

"...So when a little child departs,

we who are left behind

Must realize God loves children --

Angels are hard to find."

In Pictures: Kaitlyn's first boat trip

So it was a long three week stretch here. Daddy's been busting his tail for work, just wrapping up Market America 2010 International Convention. Lots of hours, lots of work, little time to recover. Eighteen out of 19 days at work, mostly extended hours.

For a four-day stretch, I didn't see Kaitlyn awake. Barely saw Mommy awake during those days, too. Yikes.

So what was a family to do? A little R&R, thanks to some friends. Growing Up Kaitlyn was invited out to Belews Lake, which is a pretty sweet place not too far from home base here in the BFE. So Saturday afternoon, we trekked out to the lake, met our friends and enjoyed some swimming and tubing in 90-degree lake water (thanks in some part to the Duke Energy Plant right on its banks. Don't worry -- the green glow only last a couple hours).

Promises, promises.

So it's been more than a month since my last post. Yeah, yeah, yeah: I know I said work would affect Growing Up Kaitlyn. I know I dropped the ball on that (twice).

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Right?

Well, I'm here to tell you that I'm going to try and not fall into this pit for a third time. I promise to do better. I promise to post more frequently. I promise to use work time to get the job done. I promise to keep you all abreast of everything Kaitlyn because, well, it's Kaitlyn. She's friggin' adorable and smart and playful and hilarious and adorable and everything else.

So here's the deal: I promise to do all I can to keep Growing Up Kaitlyn going strong. All you have to do is keep me on my toes. Leave comments asking where the heck I am if you haven't seen something new in, oh, four or so days. Shoot me a comment on Facebook. Reply via Twitter.

Let me know what you're missing. Because sometimes, when you're Growing Up Kaitlyn, there's so much to share that we forget.

Skyping your playdates

I remember when I was growing up and we used to run across the street to see our friends, or ride our bikes up the road to another friend's house. There were the few occasions that Mom would drive us to someone's house and we'd play there all day.

Fast forward to today, when many of those interactions are done virtually among today's children. Whether it be IM, text messaging or online gaming, kids today just don't see each other. They might communicate, but they don't interact. I see this as a problem, but apparently I'm not one of the cool kids, which isn't anything new. I mean, you don't get voted "Most Talkative" in high school because they like you, right?

I digress. The cool kids from yesteryear are now the cool parents who are experimenting with video playdates, which is exactly as it sounds -- kids playing with kids via computer modems and monitors. Which isn't really playing as much as watching a really lame reality TV show.

One of the leaders in this new realm of non-playing playdates is Lana Yarosh, a Ph.D. candidate in human-centered computing at Georgia Tech University. She's tinkered with regular video chats for kids, having kids play show-and-tell with multiple cameras and even WWE-style action sequences: "In another [method], playmates share a virtual playpen of sorts, where they see each others' toys and bodies projected onto the floor."

"They were jumping on top of each other. They were having battles. One of the kids said, 'This is a lot of fun and it's actually better than being in the same room because we're not hurting each other.' 

The purpose of these video playdates, Yarosh says, is for "friends to stay in touch when their parents can't drive them to each other's houses or to the park." To her credit, Yarosh does state that video playdates are "more work" because, you know, they're not in the same room. But Yarosh believes the same level of social interaction takes place in these virtual playdates.

The reaction by the masses: Thanks, but no thanks. I tend to agree. One of the highlights of the weekends for us is when Kaitlyn repeatedly asks us who we're going to see that day. It could be Declan-Lilly (they're always combined, I don't know why), it could be Baby E, it might be Sophia. She loves playing with her friends, running around in circles and pushing strollers and playing with dolls and cars and laughing. Lots and lots of laughing.

No matter how busy the schedule is, we'll always make time to bring Kaitlyn to see her friends. The need for interaction is important -- it helps shape who we are, it helps us later in life (see: School) and it creates a fun environment to explore and imagine.

Skype has its place; we love talking to Nana and Pop-Pop and Aunt Debbie, Uncle Chris and Cousin Colin and everyone else who has it. It just doesn't seem like a substitute for human interaction.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to my online Scrabble game with Michelle. She's texting me feverishly from the other room because it's my turn. 

Double the Children, Double the Fun

For those of you who read the title of this post and thought of sending congratulatory emails, presents and phone calls, you'll be disappointed. You can still send gifts if you want, but there's no bun in the oven.

You see, a couple weeks back we took Kaitlyn's buddy, Declan, out for a couple hours. Mom and Dad Donaghue were packing up the house to prepare for their big move, so having Declan out and about for a couple hours was a big help.

So Michelle and I called upon old reliable to keep the kids occupied -- The Natural Science Center of Greensboro.

Yes, that is a big blue frog Kaitlyn is sitting on. 

I don't know whether she's holding on for dear life or copping a feel. I do know she's smiling, if that provides a clue.

Declan is either staring at the monkey, or at the zoo keeper throwing food from the wrong side of the net. Stupid zoo keeper.

This is the angle I saw Michelle and Kaitlyn the entire time at the Science Center. That's because Declan moseys. How slow is Declan? I took with picture with the zoom all the way out.

Kaitlyn tried to feed Declan the entire time. I don't know why she treated him like one of her dolls. I do know he didn't seem to mind.

Brushing the goat. Took Declan a bit to warm up, but he eventually helped. Side note: See that little beard on the goat? They don't like it when you yank on it.

In Pictures: Strange(r)s in our house for an egg hunt party!

Well, they're really not strangers, but it fit NaBloPoMo (Can you believe there are only three days left?!?! Did I just jinx myself?!?!?! How long of a break am I going to take after this whole thing ends?!?! And who's more excited for the break -- me or my readers?!?!)

It's a busy weekend for the Growing Up Kaitlyn crew. Saturday was the First Annual Easter Egg Hunt, sponsored by Midas (not really, but wouldn't it be cool to get a sponsor? Goal for 2011: Get a Sponsor for the 2011 Growing Up Kaitlyn Easter Egg Hunt). Today we head to Curious George on stage at the Coliseum after YaYa and PopPop come over the breakfast, after Michelle goes dress shopping with Aunt Shannon and after we get the house back in order.

Did I mention it's a busy weekend?

Whoever decided 25 people, plus kids, in a tiny townhome at 9 a.m. was a good idea should have a good, stern talking-to.

They're off! The first two Easter egg hunters fly out the door.

The hunt begins.

The hunt continues.

Much like Halloween, the kids decide to see what they can exchange after pouring over their loot.

If you couldn't have guessed, Kaitlyn found the most eggs.

Strange(r)s in my house: Egg Hunt

I was going to talk about how Michelle and I had about 200 people in our little tiny townhome for an Easter egg hunt, but I feel more compelled to write about my experience writing this blog.

So you know how I normally post a funny little image or something that goes along with the topic I'm writing about? If you don't, well then welcome to Growing Up Kaitlyn. Anywho, I was thinking, What's funnier than having 200 people in our tiny little townhome? so I decided to try and find a clown car image. You know, thinking 25 clowns in a Hyundai or something would be a cute little photo to go with this post.

You know what I found? A whole mess of images labeled "Vagina". No kidding. You know why? Because all of the images are in reference to the Duggars and OctoMom. I mean, I was looking for an innocent image of a bunch of clowns coming out of a VW Beetle or something and all I get are photos with a big ol' "V" plastered on them.

And you wonder why society is going down the toilet. Oh well, you'll hear more about the Easter egg hunt tomorrow, I guess. I have to get this bad taste out of my mouth.

In Pictures: Birthday Party, Part II

Now I know why the Big Guy rested on a Sunday.

Yesterday was Kaitlyn's birthday party and it takes a lot of work to pull off a toddler's party. Between the cooking, the planning, the shopping, the cleaning and the hosting, it's no wonder these things drive parents crazy. I'm plum-tuckered.

But it was a very nice party thanks to all that work. Michelle's anal retentiveness organizational skills came in very handy; she's a list Nazi maker and likes to crack the whip take initiative. It's a good thing I ignore her and do my own thing take direction well and can multi-task.

Anywho, here's what you've been waiting for:

Kaitlyn's first guest arrives. Soon to follow: Kaitlyn realizing guests are nothing more than deliverers of presents

Party activity: finger painting. After-party activity: cleaning up finger painting

The kids' going-home-from-party gift was a handprint done with the help of the wonderful Kylie (left), who helped the kids during arts and crafts time at the party

After arts-and-crafts time, the kids -- both big and small -- had some outdoor fun while Daddy cleaned up inside.

Two kids enter, one kid leaves: the fathers were taking bets on which child would win each battle. I bet on Kaitlyn because, well, she's built like a linebacker

Oh yeah, time for cake and presents. And by the way Daddy: Get this stupid hat off me

Kaitlyn could care less about the card, considering there's a Yo Gabba Gabba toy in front of her. On a side note: Everyone who purchased a toy that makes noise/sound will be receiving a drum set for their child's second birthday

As you can tell by the looks on Mommy's and Daddy's faces, another Yo Gabba Gabba toy that makes noise was opened. I am actually pointing Kaitlyn toward the puzzles out of camera range, attempting to distract her. It didn't work

So there you have it, Kaitlyn's birthday party, in pictures. I don't think there's anything else. Oh wait, that's right:

The final product. I have to admit, I'm not completely pleased with the look. I completely understand why people charge the amounts they do to decorate cakes, though. I had these grandiose plans for decorating, but soon realized that I didn't have the tools for the intricate work or the know-how to accomplish some of the detailed parts.

The good news was that no one spit out the finished cake because it tasted poorly. It actually tasted pretty good. Michelle even gave it her stamp of approval, no small feat considering her cake-snobbery.

"UP" is a very misleading movie title

When we were in New Jersey, Nana bought a copy of Disney's UP since we never saw it. The movie actually didn't work, which disappointed us since it was a movie we could sit down and watch with Kaitlyn (one that we actually wanted to see, anyway).

Flash forward to last week. In preparation for The Nightmare Before Christmas, Michelle decided to pick up some movies from redbox (Best. Invention. Ever.). We stayed in Friday night, made some Christmas cookies with Aunt Shannon and tucked ourselves in to watch some movies. UP was one of those movies.

Now, if you haven't seen the movie and plan to, I would recommend you stop reading this post. Here, enjoy this collection of Kaitlyn videos instead.

UP is not the word I would use to describe this movie. While a really good movie as a whole, Disney turned up the depression knob on some of the more poignant points in the movie. Now, I'm used to seeing some sad spots in Disney movies. But I don't remember a Disney movie that, throughout the whole thing, I said to myself Man, that's sad numerous times.

Let us count the ways:

• In the first 15 minutes, we watch a montage of this couple growing old together, only to play witness to the death of the main character's wife (without fulfilling their dream).
• Then, we see the main character get ushered into court only to have his freedom yanked from him by a greedy corporation for the sole purpose of demolishing his dream house.
• We listen to the sidekick's sad tale of how his father abandoned his family, remarry and not want anything to do with his son.
• The main character's childhood hero turns out to be a greedy old man, making our hero realize his dreams (and his wife's) were built on lies.

Like I said, depressing. Aunt Shannon was actually so disturbed by the movie's messages that she stopped watching it halfway through because it was depressing her. Kaitlyn didn't even sit through the whole thing, which is something to say considering it was a cartoon. And it was Disney. Yikes.

Then, after all this heavy stuff laid on you, the movie gets completely wacky as dogs start flying mini pop planes. I mean, Disney creates this very serious movie (granted, with the fun Disney humor and spin put on it) only to go completely over the silly line in the final 20 minutes. If not for that, this would be a real good movie -- for adults. This is not (repeat: this is NOT) a children's movie.

On a side note, I never thought Meryl Streep could look any uglier until I saw Julie & Julia. I mean, the woman's not attractive to begin with, but making her look like Julia Child is downright criminal on the viewers' eyes. That being said, she is a great actress. But there's a reason some people are better suited for radio.

Meet Teddy

Teddy has always been a staple in Michelle's life. Of course there are all the childhood memories, but that would only be scratching the surface of Teddy's exploits, since everyone had that favorite stuffed animal when they were growing up.

You see, Teddy went to college with Michelle. Teddy slept with Michelle through her years at Towson University. There were stories about how Teddy was hidden from Michelle by the girls and guys, how Michelle might find Teddy the next day hanging from a light fixture or ceiling fan. Michelle was not amused.

Teddy made her way home with Michelle after college (How do we know Teddy is a she? Well, there's a hole between Teddy's legs from the seams popping, which made for some rather unsavory stories, according to Michelle's friends).

When Michelle and I moved in together, Teddy came along. And yes, Teddy still had a place in the bed. Teddy made it to our wedding, albeit in a duffel bag in the honeymoon suite. Michelle actually wanted to pin Teddy underneath her dress, but I think YaYa got the better of that argument.

Teddy is a world traveler, too. Besides going on the honeymoon to Jamaica (yes, ugh), Teddy went to London in high school and the Dominican Republic when Michelle and her friend Laura did some after college "discovery." Teddy's criss-crossed the country, usually in Michelle's pillowcase so she knew where Teddy was at all times. Teddy's been (to my knowledge) to Arizona, Seattle, California and every state on the east coast from New York to Florida.

Teddy's place in the house has always been by Michelle's side. In recent years, Teddy moved from the bed to the nightstand because Michelle was afraid that our dog would use Teddy as a chew toy. But every night, there was Teddy right next to Michelle.

I don't think Michelle ever thought of a day when Teddy wouldn't be by her side.

The other day, Michelle noticed that Kaitlyn was holding Teddy. At first, she thought this was cute, since her daughter was meeting her Teddy. But then a funny thing happened. Kaitlyn started actually bring Teddy with her places.

So far it's been confined to the house. But when you turn around, there's Teddy lying on the floor, Kaitlyn telling Teddy to "Go to sleep," covering Teddy with a dish towel. There's Kaitlyn holding Teddy while watching Dora. There's Teddy in Kaitlyn's crib at night, my daughter's arm wrapped tightly around my wife's slice of childhood.

You can see in her face that Michelle is torn by this chain of events. After all, this is her Teddy, not Kaitlyn's Teddy. I'm sure that somewhere, sometime, Michelle thought she'd hand Teddy down to her child. But to actually see it happening has brought a gush of emotions over her. I'm sure she secretly thinks, Get your own damn Teddy.

So now here Teddy sits, on the bench next to the snowman, waiting for her girl to come home. Much to my wife's dismay, she's not that girl anymore.

In Pictures: Cookie-making time

After reading about our friend Gwendolyn Brown-Johnson yesterday, Michelle looked at me and said, "We just had fun this weekend baking cookies and it was cute and you write about this?"

You see, Michelle thinks this blog should be about her and Kaitlyn and the fun and beauty and hilarity that is parenting. Mostly, though, about her. I have attempted to tell her that the blog is about our family and the things we talk about, see and go through on a daily basis. But she wants more cowbell. And by cowbell, she means her.*

What she didn't know what that I was already planning a post about our cookie escapade, but hadn't yet completed it. And it's a good thing I didn't since Michelle decided to whip up a batch of cookies using Grandma Gill's recipe for chocolate chip macaroons.

At first we thought the gritty texture was due to the fact that she didn't mix the sugar into the egg whites enough, leaving the macaroons as crumbly, chocolate chip-filled sugar mounds. That's how Grandma's were, too, she said coolly. This from someone who likes to put 12 to 15 sugar packets in her non-sweetened iced tea "just to crunch the sugar at the bottom."

About an hour after chowing down a half-dozen of these pure sugar concoctions, Michelle took a second look at the recipe. Oh, she says quietly. I put three cups of sugar in the mix when it called for three-quarters of a cup sugar.

Oh? No wonder Kaitlyn didn't want to go nite-nite. So, as you read this, Michelle's entire floor at work is probably bouncing off the walls screaming for more macaroons.

Anywho, here's the rest of the cookie-making fun from this past weekend, in pictures:

We invited Aunt Kari over to bake. You remember Aunt Kari, right? Anyhow, she decided that she should bring her entire pantry to the party. Like we wouldn't let her borrow sugar or something.

This is me sifting flour for Aunt Kari, since she didn't know what "sift" meant when reading the recipes. No joke.

Aunt Kari and Michelle hard at work trying to figure out how to operate the food processor. Which led to ...

... me pounding cookies by hand because the darn thing wouldn't start. 

One of the cookie recipes that Aunt Kari used called for a glaze. This is how Aunt Kari's "glaze" turned out. On a side note, this is eerily similar to how Michelle's macaroons looked and, based on the amount of sugar in each, tasted, as well.

* I love you, honey. 

In Pictures: Kaitlyn at the NC Zoo

I've been lax on putting these up, but here are some photos of our adventure to the NC Zoo from last weekend, save the elephant happiness. For more pics, head over to Facebook.

The girls (Aunt Kari, Kaitlyn and Michelle) begin their animal adventure

Aunt Kari and Kaitlyn checking out the polar bears

Kaitlyn loves a good water feature

Playing in the bee hive. Notice the MJ-like tongue wag going on

Kaitlyn wasn't in the mood for picture-taking toward the latter portion of the day

Crying babies = birth control for non-parents

It's not typical for Michelle and I to get a babysitter and go out for an evening. I think I can count on one hand the number of times we asked for such a reprieve from Kaitlyn. Those times we have done so, family and friends have stepped up to the plate so we didn't have to shell out ducats for the privilege of shelling out more ducats.

Friends like Aunt Shannon.

Wonderful Aunt Shannon, one of the first people at the hospital when Kaitlyn was born, who watched Boo for a week only minutes hours days after meeting me and Michelle, who cooks some mean chicken cheese steaks and kindly invites us to dinner. Wonderful Aunt Shannon.

Kaitlyn loves her some Aunt Shannon. Always points out Aunt Shannon's house on walks. Always a hug for Aunt Shannon. One of Kaitlyn's first words was "Dutch," an abbreviated "Dutchess," which is Aunt Shannon's dog.

There was a surprise party last night for one of our neighbors, Kim, who turned 30. We asked Aunt Shannon if she could watch Kaitlyn for a bit so we could make an appearance. Aunt Shannon, always willing to help, said sure. So around 7:30 pm, Aunt Shannon and Dutchess came by.

Okay, before we go any further: Rewind to earlier that same day. I pick up Kaitlyn from daycare. I read her progress report sheet for the day. Little bit of a temperature, but nothing out of the ordinary. Ate great, go figure. Nap Time: 11:55 am - 12:30 pm.

WHA?!?!???! Oh this can't be right, I say to the teacher. Yes, she replies. And she knows this to be correct because at half-past noon when Kaitlyn stirred, she was so loud that she woke the rest of the room up, causing no one to get a true nap time in. When Kaitlyn ain't happy, nobody's happy.

I knew this would lead to one of two scenarios: The first, Kaitlyn would crash early and Aunt Shannon would have the easiest of easy nights. The second, well ...

At 8:30 pm, while at the party, Michelle's phone rings. She picks it up.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

I still don't know whether that sound came from Kaitlyn or Aunt Shannon. All I know is party over, time to go. We walk in our front door and there she is: a scared, tired and shaking girl, looking like someone just crushed all her hopes and dreams. Her eyes, so wide and empty. She didn't know what was going on.

And there was Kaitlyn, too.

Apparently our little girl was so tired she had a meltdown, which is Scenario #2. I know I didn't have to tell you that, but I probably should have told Aunt Shannon that. I tried every soothing technique that I know, Aunt Shannon assured us. Nothing.

I take Kaitlyn and lay on the floor, stroking her back to calm her down. She eventually rests her head on my shoulder and falls back asleep in mere minutes. Michelle takes Aunt Shannon and sits on the couch, stroking her back to calm her down. She eventually rests her head on the cushion and lets out a sigh, ready to head home.

Aunt Shannon loves her some Kaitlyn, but this night was a little rough on her. Jokingly, I tell Aunt Shannon she's more than welcome to keep Kaitlyn when Michelle and I go up to New Jersey in the coming weeks. Instead of watching Boo, she can watch Kaitlyn and we'll take the dog with us.

No, she said definitively. That's all the birth control I need right there.

The birds, the bees and the elephant's junk

I wasn't supposed to write a blog post this afternoon. It wasn't supposed to be like this.

I was supposed to post a couple of pictures showing everyone what a great time we had at the N.C. Zoo with Aunt Kari. I was supposed to say We had a great time, take a look! and call it a day. Mail it in for today and then go into some more detail tomorrow, getting two posts for the price of one.

We weren't supposed to see six feet worth of elephant happiness.

We were having a great time walking around the zoo. We toured the North America pavilion, checked out some animals. Kaitlyn walked nearly the entire time; no small feat considering the place is 500 acres and has about five miles of trails.

We were about halfway done with the African pavilion when we made it over to the Watani Grasslands, where the elephants hang (pun intended). And boy, oh boy, did this elephant hang.

Michelle and Aunt Kari couldn't stop watching this poor elephant just flapping in the cool fall air, which apparently doesn't affect his "stature" as it does his human counterparts. There the girls stood, for a good three or four minutes, staring intensely. More scared than anything.

Michelle: It's like a train wreck.

Aunt Kari: I know. I can't move my eyes off it.

Aunt Kari: I feel so bad for those female elephants.

Me: You realize their asses are the size of a Buick, right? It's all relative. (Now, I don't know if female elephants like to swing that way, but you get the idea. I'm going to guess that at one of those watering holes a fertile male elephant can find a promiscuous female willing to "give anything a try once.")

Thank goodness Kaitlyn is old enough to know her animals, yet too young to even start recognizing anything that might be, well, off. And no, we did not take a picture, much to the dismay of Aunt Kari. Apparently she wanted a keepsake.

The elephant in question, post-erection